Hail Bacon Shirt Summons the Dead to Cook your Bacon

Only the lord of the underworld truly understands humanity and what humanity needs. Drugs, vampire orgies, foul language, deceit and our favorite sin of creature comforts... bacon.

Over at etsy, our friend econographics made this Hail Bacon Shirt that makes sure your friends and family recognize your allegiance to the head honcho of darkness(unofficial creator of bacon)...

"I will meet you on the slaughterhouse floor and there we can harvest our bacon." -  \m/

Bacon Sunflower Seeds

Sunflower seeds are good as hell. I spent a lifetime trying to master eating them without spitting out the shell. Good for the tastebuds, bad for the anus. A trade off I am willing to make.

So... take that logic and apply it to bigs sizzlin' bacon sunflower seeds and compete your digestive cycle with a sense of pride.

Baconcado - Love child of bacon and avocado

Avocados are one of my favorite things to eat that are actually good for you. The baconcado - half avocado half bacon - is the product of a torrid romance not seen since the advent of the milky way galaxy.

"Part Bacon, Part Goat Cheese, Part Avacado and 100% awesomeness."

They have all the details on how to make this over at baconjew.

Bacon Shot

Getting drunk is pretty fun. Being drunk is even better! With that said, we all know the best way to reach our anti-sobriety goals. Shots !

The good people over at the royalbaconsociety.com have crafted a seemingly delightful way to get your booze and bacon intake simultaneously. Grab some bacon vodka and bring on the ladies of the night.

Looks like they were asked by the OTHER good people at baconshot.net to try this out.

Bacon Jam Takes the Thrown

Grape.. strawberry... raspberry...
Move over and bow to your leader.
Bacon Jam.

"Bacon jam is excellent on slices of tomatoes, plopped on a warm biscuit, stirred into a bowl of beans or spread on top of a cheeseburger. Or you can just grab a spoon and dig into your jar."

There are just too many applications... good work all.

Meat Baby with Bacon Diaper

When it comes to eating babies... the conversation always starts off with “I was stoned. It seemed like a fun thing to do at the time...”

Take a look here and you can join the ranks of the faux-cannibalistic crowd and bring the baby eating to your neck of the woods.

Here is another meat infant replica for your digestive system.

Man Caught for trying to steal three pounds of Bacon in his pants!

Most times... getting caught for trying to pull off a crime really sucks. Especially when you are about to score a good amount of delicious bacon!

"He was charged with retail theft and resisting property recovery by a retail merchant."

Read on.. and shake your head and say.. "almost man.. never stop trying.."

Thanks go to Sal for spotting this sad gem.

Bacon Bookmark of Ultimate Radness

So now that you are a grownup, you tend to do adult things. Guns, flying jets, dirty magazines, robbing liquor stores, video games, ransacking castles, and once in a while... reading books.

Whats the best way to let yourself know where you last left off in that scifi-space horror novel?!

That's right good sir/maam... a bacon bookmark! It's simple... sleek and for 6 bucks, you can have your own.

International Bacon Day

It is said that even serfs lead less stresfull lives than us. Flouridated water, mortgages, traffic, our self imposed shackles make us sweat it out on electric workstations for meager rewards.

But fuck all that.

Its international bacon day tommorow!

From the source:
Bacon Day is held on the Saturday before Labor Day US (the first Monday of Sep.). This year that is the 5th of September. Last year Bacon Day was celebrated in the US, Australia, Canada, South Africa, Switzerland, and the UK. Lets see how many more countries we can add to the list this year!

Bacon with French Fries Stuck to it

It was a cool morning... mid-spring 2008, when Jesus, Mohammad, Ganesh, Princess Zelda and some elf tree spirits were sitting around thinking of the best invention that they could give to humans (besides the chainsaw and lasers) and behold...

Bacon on a god damn stick with french fries blasted on it.

Note: French fries attached to the bacon with thick corndog batter.

Bacon Scented Candles

Ohh how I love the smell of flesh in the morning. Well, now you can smell crispy bacon bits all day long!

For a measly $11 you can fill your home with yummy(bad ass) bacon smells. Go here to take a peek and then BUY that sucker.

Oh and btw... these beauties are triple-scented. Cause single or double is just freakin' lame.

Bacon Sabers

As some of you may know, I am always on the lookout for a good fight to the death. You know, remove an arm, a nice jab to the gut... a quick(or slow) decapitation... it goes on and on.

Now.. all we need are a few swords to wield.

"Take 4 lbs of bacon, 3 lbs of sausage, 6 links of kielbasa and some BBQ sauce and make..." BACON SABERS.

Let the reckless bacon slaughtering begin.